Don't Let Negativity Rule Over You

These past weeks, I felt so empty. It's like there's a piece of my body that's so incomplete. My daily routine seems so boring.

If you know me, I am a SAHM and alone at home taking care of my son while my hubby is on his voyage for a couple of weeks without communication. I have faced a little bit challenges in our church specifically in leadership. I've been stressed and pressured for what's happening in our surroundings. As a member of our church for almost 16 years, I am so blessed and happy serving the Lord, but it seems that happiness became bitterness little by little.

Being a leader you should set a good example for others, but what if your leaders keep acting like a deaf and doing not but say sorry? Also, what if those leaders are so dependent on others? Even for the very simple things they cannot fix - just stare and relax you don't even see the pressure to them. And lastly, what if those leaders are not communicating with each other and even don't confront problems and it seems they were avoiding to talk about main problem?

What would you feel if your leaders are not united?

Discouragement is one of the biggest things that I prayed and hope that never happen to me. But I am just human being living this old nature and negative things can affect my body and soul and mind anytime too because of circumstances. I admit to myself that most of the time, I become a nagger, overreacting to things if I hear something, I always wanted to confront person right away if there is something wrong to avoid conflicts.
Negative auras are so powerful. When I'm at home resting, there are people who keeps sharing negative things. Sometimes I don't know what to say, but I should be careful also to share my thoughts about the problem and try to understand them. But sometimes I realize that it seems gradually septic me and also I'll become a negative thinker these past few days.

Things that I consider why negative almost swallowed me

1. Environment
"Cleanliness is next to Godliness" this phrase is very concise and explainable. This phrase is about spiritual purity and holiness the very important things being a Christian, (our Christian walk)  the bible says "Clean out the old leaven so that you may be a new lump,.. 1 Cor.5:7

But I will emphasize here the cleanliness literally, last week was so dismayed when I saw a place so messy and there is someone sitting and playing solitaire while the environment was so stinking and messy. My heart beat fast and my whole body was trembling - I decided to walk away. After a few minutes, I decided to talk to some of my companions until my temper calm down.

2. Listening Negative things to others
Negative things might help you by learning its lesson or sometimes negative things will absorb in you and rule over you. The impact and influence of negative people around you will lead you to have a negative perspective in life and until you'll never notice that the way you response things even it's appreciable you will become a judgmental.

Honestly this past three days I choose to hide and locked my doors in my room and meditate.  I knew that I become an introvert this time. I have decided to retreat and plan to quit the leadership and teaching Sunday School, I plan to focus on my son and other things out of my mind but I thank God for the wisdom that He gave to me. He used my husband to encourage me a lot and pray that I will be stronger and be prayerful in all things. When my husband has a signal and internet connection for 48 hours he helped me to find myself back to the old me, he knew that I was already drained and needed to re-charge. After our heart to heart conversation para akong nabunutan nang tinik and I thank God so much.

3 Things I learned after

1. WALK by faith and not by sight
In an organization, if you will look at people, there is a possibility that you will stumble and discourage by them. I need to bear in mind that we only human and not perfect Jesus Christ is the only person who's perfect. Always think my self that I always fail also and not perfect so I should learn how to forgive. The Word of God says that "for we walk by faith and not by sight..." 2 Cor.5:7
Because in due time we will give our account to God individually.

2. Slow to anger
I also learned that I should be managing my temper and my tolerance to other people, learn to pause and think before speaking. The more I talk the more I commit sin and less talk less sin. I know my anger can't help instead be calm James 1:19-22.

3. Self- Control
First time again that I really got mad that time I lost my tolerance and my body was trembling. But I hope I always remember that fruit of the Holy Spirit. I needed to control my body and getting so mad is not good for the health. I realized that it's very different now I should me matured in my actions and be responsible and I felt so sorry.

4. Always find the good sides and learn to appreciate
Even while the world will bring you negative auras, always remember to look at the bright side of things. I learned that I don't need to look after the negative things but also in good things.

5. Reading the word of God and pray
I admit myself that this month and last month I became so lax at reading the word of God.  somewhat neglected my personal devotion that's why I became weak spiritually and I really felt that the hunger for the word of God. It's always the partner reading and meditation the word of God praying. The word of God will teach you and guide you the right thing to do and remind you when you are not on the right path.

Every day we struggle with different challenges in our lives but always remember negative things happens to us to open our eyes and teach us to appreciate the situation even at it's worst. Don't let the negativity rule over you!